The Alter-Ego

Writing is a unique pleasure. It piques your grey cells, gets your adrenaline pumping in a queer way and sets your mind wandering off to distant lands. The first time I wrote I realized that it was an exercise in self actualization. It soon became a passion and today writing has become a part of me. But the irony of it all is how I felt about taking a pen when I was at school and college. I was terrified, I was afraid that I would embarrass myself and I refused to write even 100 words. One day though, I forced myself to attempt writing and the rest just fell in place.

My friends know that I am mad about water sports, adventures and the stage. But there is something that very few know till now and that’s my alter-ego! I have, always in life, been driven by insecurity! Insecurity that one day my fears will get the better of me!

There have been times when I felt so scared of water that I used to dread the swimming classes my mom took me to. I remember the days when I shivered on stage and refused to speak one word in English. And the one fear that has perhaps been the longest in my memory is the morbid fear of heights. I still find my nerves jangling and my head going off into a tizzy when I stand at the very top and look below.

But I found the right people in life and the right guidance. I kept hearing the oft repeated cliché “facing fears is the only way to be rid of them” and “Rise above fear, beyond fear is victory”. One day a switch inside of me flipped and I decided to step over the line and try! It was a huge step for me. On the one hand I was facing the risk of embarrassment in front of people and on the other hand the risk of getting hit physically. But I took a leap of faith, literally… and that’s when my love affair with the sea and water in general started. Today I absolutely love the idea of a swim or a dip in the ocean and I am not scared anymore of water.

Public speaking was very similar too and so was writing. Today I maintain a blog and I absolutely love the experience. My toastmasters journey is one I cherish the most.

Writing this article has helped me reflect on my alter ego and I thank Indigblogger for pushing me to write. I realize that I am a man of two opposites (yes even today) and most of my passions were initially my fears. When I did choose to face them head on they became my allies! The experience is electric and it is truly a fantastic journey. I am afraid still, but I see that there is an opportunity in fear and I like that challenge.

I loved this recent ad from Mountain Dew. It is a fantastic illustration of how fun life could be, if we let go of our fears and took that Leap of faith. Fear is a wall we refuse to see beyond. If only we stepped out… :)



The cliché is true after all :) Face them if you want to conquer them! Or, as the folks at Mountain Dew say, Darr kea age jeeth hain :)

My Wish List!

I have always loved travelling and my tastes when it comes to places of stay are quite varied. I have always asked myself what kind of places would i love to stay. Every time my answer has been different. I have never outwardly expressed my tastes before, but the Indiblogger community in association with AirBnb has given me an interesting chance to do just that :) 

Airbnb is a trusted community marketplace for people to list, discover, and book unique accommodations around the world — on-line or from a mobile phone. Airbnb connects people to unique travel experiences, at any price point, in more than 34,000 cities and 190+ countries. Check out more about AirBnb in this https://www.airbnb.co.in/?af=3330229&c=IndiBlogger. 

So here's my Wish-List from the thousands of listings on AirBnb. How I wish I could visit all these places. That would be some vacation wouldn't it? :)

The places I have chosen in my wish list are 

1. Chile – This country is quite unusual. On a map, It looks like a long ribbon. Its geography extends linearly. The beaches in Chile are famous and are a unique pleasure. I have chosen a unique Boat stay at Chile and I wish someday I could visit here!

2. Iceland – Ever since I heard Christopher Nolan’s interstellar was shot extensively in this part of the world, I have wanted to visit Iceland. Take a look at the place on my wish list and you will fall in love too :)

Pictures from airbnb.co.in

3. CA – I have chosen this place more for the property, The Hobbit Hut. Such a fantasy it would be. To live the life of a Hobbit! Being a huge fan of the Lord of the Rings, this place is a must visit for me!

4. Indonesia – A place I am visiting shortly! The property I have selected is 2 BHK with a private pool. Located at the most happening part of Bali, this is quite an attractive place to stay in

5. Paris – The most romantic city in the world. The home of the Eiffel tower and the location to die for. This was an obvious choice on my wish list. The property I have chosen is a beautiful flat, replete with a completely intimate and romantic setting, it truly reflects the city’s spirit.

6. London – The city of my dreams. I would vote London as my most favorite city. I love the culture, the people and the language they speak. They are the founders of Cricket, home to the Premier League of football and the home of Sherlock Holmes. That it is my favorite city is so elementary, isn’t it Watson? ;)

7. India – Maybe the last but by no means the least. My home. The land of palaces and beauty. I have chosen the Charming Bungalow in UP. It is my utmost desire to stay in a huge place someday. The wish gets fulfilled in the wish list first ;)

Oh before I forget, there is an amazing referral program on this too :) Here's my referral https://www.airbnb.co.in/invite/?af=3330229&c=IndiBloggerref. Use this link to get free credits :) Remember, you multiply joy, when you share :) So go ahead, use you credits and share them with your friends :) 

PS - If you need free credits, post your email on the comments here and I will send you some credits ;)

Yes or No

So much has been talked/debated/written about pre-marital sex. Those who stand for it vow that it is their right to decide what they must or must not do, and those against it use the “Moral” code perhaps too generously. What amuses me though, is how the question bypassed several other levels and directly came into the “Right” or “Wrong” category. How did the debate transcend many other points of contention before it came to ask people “Are you for or against it?”.

For example, say I eat Noodles for dinner… people don’t immediately start debating on if they are for or against following the same eating pattern. It ultimately stops one step before and the verdict is “It may not be a healthy practice, but it’s the individual’s wish”. Same goes for the colors someone prefers, the homes people build, the jobs they work in or even the partners they choose for life! So why then did the question of pre-marital sex get classified in the “Right or Wrong”, “For or Against, “Stand by it or Swear against it scenario”?. Well, the reason I can think of it is because our country holds the institution of marriage as the highest social yardstick, and with good reason I must add.

Evolution has always started with chaos. The Universe evolved from Chaos but over a period of time it survived because some form of Order seeped into its existence. Mankind is no different. When marriage was not yet as prevalent the social evils against women were uncontrollable. Marriage brought in a sense of order. In India it is practically very difficult to be socially safe without marriage. Unfortunately into all our lives corruption has seeped in. Punishments are never fair, justice is very rarely served. The moral fear of committing a mistake has practically been washed away. And hence, the need for the institution of marriage assumed strength. It became necessary before you got the “LICENSE”. Evolution is a continuous process and once order set in, man started questioning why it is there. So here we are again, questioning why marriage should be a factor in determining whether I am allowed to do something or not.

Personally my views are completely away from the Yes or No question. From how I see it, before we ask the “right or wrong” question, we must think and answer the questions: “Is it necessary or not”, “Is it worth it or not”. Most of us debate on whether the indulgence is right or wrong, but are we actually debating/discussing on the consequences of the act? Are we considering the emotional and physical changes we might undergo after? We live in a society where getting pregnant before marriage is considered a Taboo, we cannot change it overnight. So, are we ready to tackle that scenario in a sensitive way wherein no one involved is hurt? Emotionally and physically? Are the precautions we might undertake fail-proof? Are we ready to face the consequences?

If the two people involved are sure of what they are doing and have planned it all out to face whatever may happen after the indulgence, then there is no question at all. But if they aren’t.. and the only reason to even do it is social pressure or incapacity to control overflowing hormones or just to experience the short thrill… then it is completely not fair to do it.

Is it Right or Wrong? Ask yourself. Is it necessary or not? Ask each other.

I am hopeful that more insights and opinions would be discussed in the new book by Poonam Uppal - A Passionate Gospel of True Love : A Mystical True Love Story

But no matter what, just be prepared to face the consequences. Our short-sightedness prevents us from looking at anything beyond the few minutes/hours of pleasure. It is in this trait of mankind though, that the universe moves onward… albeit in circles!